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how to survive the world of fashion parties

After the madness of last night's Miley Cyrus party at Madame JoJo's, i-D Fashion Editor Jack Borkett tries to remember what it is that makes a fashion party memorable!

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Most Fashion events hold several key factors to their success. Obviously they are full of attractive people, which helps. A room full of models is always fabulous, even if it just means there are more canapés for me. Also, fashion people are fun. Being bullied as a child has probably had some kind of lasting impact on them. Being the ugly duckling and then blossoming into a marvellous Amazonian creature does something to you, trust me, I know.

When I woke up this morning, wishing it was Saturday and gagging in the shower with a face full of glitter, which is actually still all over my face and keyboard as I write this, slightly clammy, with a bottle of Powerade close to hand, I reminiscence about the night before. Supermodels and celebrities crammed into a mosh pit.

Miley Cyrus in a red wig twerking on you. It’s all a little overwhelming. But what fun!


Remember though, it’s a small business so you tend to know everyone. This can be a positive and negative. If you aren’t on your best behaviour everyone is going to know about it. I am talking about present day though. One can only imagine the glamour and drama of the eighties, all the cocaine and Versace. Sadly an evening like last night is not that frequent.

The location of a good party is essential, a palace or petrol station can both be rather memorable, or on a boat and feeling like Demi Moore in Striptease. We’ll always love a party on a boat, dressed in Celine and with no knickers on. Or strip clubs. Fashion people love strip clubs. One piece of advice, when pole dancing make sure all models are standing clear of the pole, my friend has smacked a models.com top 50 girl in the face with her Lucite heel; needless to say her photographer boyfriend spent the night sitting up in A&E dressed as Freddie Mercury in drag whilst said friend lost her job at Hermes the following week. But what a night…

Because of the high percentage of homosexuals in fashion the parties tend to be elevated by a mixture of good taste and loose morals. I remember a party in Milan recently, which luckily was taking place in a private room where the fashion elite were hidden away from the throngs of muscly Italian men dying to grab a sight of Anna Dello Russo and the loud yelps of “I can see Maria Carla!” Despite this separation the atmosphere tends to feel quite open generally. I suppose there is an element of celebrity watching that is the main draw. As the fashion industry is so closely connected to music and film it always has the potential to provide A-List names and #scandal.

If you haven’t smashed your teeth out on the dance floor you really haven’t lived.

 

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